Thursday, November 25, 2010

Sleeping Beauty

Shiloh Ryan, here. Don't worry. I'm not crazy or anything...I'm back to normal. Well, sane...How this is though...
You're all probably wondering what exactly happened to me for the last two weeks, and believe me, it's not something easy for me to put into words...I'll get to that in a moment, but first, theres something I need to say about, well, everything.

We live our lives based on what we accept as true, right, concrete...That's how we define our "reality" Can we really say for sure what's true? What's correct? Is the stuff in front of us concrete, or just a result of our own delusion? It's just a bunch of vague concepts, "reality" could be just as much a delusion as seeing monster or ghosts. Monsters aren't real, Ghosts aren't real...Why? Because we can't prove that they are. Our world is shaped by our own reality, our own beliefs. My reality isn't the same as anyone elses anymore. So many things are real to me now. The world I live in has been stripped of it's logical, physical bindings.

The slender man is real.
Shannon, Danny, it's best the two of you accept this before it's too late.

On November 11th, I went to Millenium Park with my friend Sean to meet up with this guy who had been stalking me and sending me all this creepy shit. We eventually saw him, and he ran immediately. We chased him out into the city, I can only imagine what the people around us thought. It didn't matter to me though, I wanted to pound this dude's face in if it was the last thing I ever did. We followed him into an alleyway, I was sprinting as fast as I could, Sean not far behind me when the blond guy turned a corner. Before we could turn it ourselves, he stepped out in front of us.

Black suit, no face. I can't put into words the horror of this moment. Everything in my life up to that point was nothing compared to seeing a nightmare become flesh.

I felt something enter me. A piercing pain in my stomach. I'd been stabbed by something long and thick, I felt where it entered and where it exited out the back. It went all the way through. Blood seemed to rocked out from my mouth. I could see each drop moving farther from my face as if it was in slow motion. After that, I must have passed out.

The next thing I remember is being dazed in dark room or garage or basement or something. I was handcuffed to some object. My memory is foggy about this part, I remember waking up many, many times during this. My concept of time was completely gone. (I must have tried to record it from my phone during one of the times I woke up as seen in the video titled "cove". I can imagine who uploaded that from my phone.)

Eventually, I woke up, this time not being so disoriented. I was in about two inches of water. It was dark, everything black, I couldn't see anything at all. I thrashed around, I could feel myself surrounded by what I can only describe as soft, thin slices of some sort of meat or something. Some were floating, some I could feel on the surface of the floor under the water. As I violently thrashed about I eventually started to inhale and swallow a bit of the water on accident. Only then did I realize it wasn't water.

It was blood.

I gasped and choked on the horrid, metallic liquid in my mouth. I vomited almost immediately; I knew it wasn't my own blood, and that thought made me vomit a second time. I was choking on the blood of other people, and it was REAL. I thrashed about ever harder, cutting my wrist on my handcuffs in the process and started screaming. It was a wonder that I wasn't doing that already. I couldn't think straight; I started clawing my eyes to find a fabric covering them. It felt like bandages. I have no idea WHY bandages were put over my eyes but it only served to freak me out even more. Instinctively I started calling out for my parents.
Isn't that sad?

I heard footsteps coming towards me, not long after that I blacked out.

The next thing I knew, he was my "father". The slender man.
Yes, I know that's crazy, but it's something I can't explain. I became his puppet after that, and...I remember everything. All of it. I don't know why I did what I was doing.

Last night, Tuesday at about 1:00AM or something...I don't remember exactly, I woke up in the middle of a forest preserve or something, not too far from my home, 16 miles maybe. Immediatley I knew that I was back to my old self. Everything that had just happened hit me instantly. Except, of course, what happened BEFORE I blacked out this time. That was the only gap.

It was like I had been joined with a different person. Like Shiloh died in that pool of blood, became someone else, and then he joined with Shiloh to become what I am now. It was like I took another person's memories as my own.

I've been reading some of the stuff I've said to some people, and I can only say that I'm sorry. That wasn't me. Whatever I became was NOT ME.

Anyway, when I woke up I took my phone out of my pocket. It was about to die, which makes sense as that was probably how I was communicating on here in the first place. Fuck my 3Gs. I went to my GPS and found where I was and started walking home in a daze. There wasn't anything else I could do anyway. After an hour or so of that, a cop rolled by and pulled up next to me. He questioned what I was doing out so late (I assume he though I was a minor or something. I'm told I look rather young for my age.) and I told him I got lost on a hike and if I could get a ride home.

I was lucky to meet such a nice fucking cop. He dropped me off at home and I spent the night in my garage. I was afraid of my parents, so I waited until the morning when they were already gone to get into the house. My jacket, which I had been wearing on the 11th was now stuffed with letters and notes covered in random scribblings...I tossed them into a bag at home. I'll look through them later, should help me make sense of this. I tried phoning Sean...No answer. I hope he's okay.

In the mirror, I looked like a total corpse. Like I hadn't eaten or done anything in two weeks. I didn't feel hungry or tired, though. I showered and laid down on my bed. The only thing I could do was scribble down the past two weeks' events.

I don't know why I went back to normal after being it's puppet, I don't know if he's still watching me, I don't know if I should sleep or what I should do. Everything has become so horrifying. I have seen and been a part of death with my own two eyes, my own two hands.

My next posts are going to largely be the accounts of my two weeks under the slender man that I've scribbled down in my journal, what I learned, what I experienced, what I felt, what I saw, and what I can figure out.
Maybe it can help me, maybe it can help you.

After all, you're all real, aren't you?
I can't believe we let ourselves be so deluded.
Is this your doing?

Oh, and that blond guy? He's dead.
A lot of people are dead.

Again, I'm sorry everyone.
I'm so, so sorry.

9 comments:

  1. It's Thankgiving, isn't it?

    Warm wishes, I guess.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Good to have you back.

    Tell me if anything more happens, or if you start to revert somehow.

    *hugs*

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  3. Im just sooooooo glad that your normal again....

    Sorry for all the thing I said... I was just angry.

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  4. Bahahaha, how convvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvenient of you to go AWOL mentally and chalk it up your own mentttal gymnastics.

    I'm disappointed, BROTHER.

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  5. I'm do glad you're okay.
    But we've gotten ourselves into some deep shit, haven't we?

    Anyways, Lucas, why do you persist in mocking others? Especially my friends and I? I'd like it if you just stopped.

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  6. Well, quite obviously I was beaten, emotionally abused, molested, spat on, lit on ffffffffffffffffffffffffffffire, stabbed, and SMILED AT as a child, which of course led me to feel insecure about my self esteem and has caused me to be a jerk on the Internet. Now that you have found me out, I will leeeeeeeaave you all alone forever until I feel that way again which will probably be OH MY GOD HE
    \
    SEES

    MEEEEEEEEEE

    THIS IS WORSE THAN I EVER IMAGINED.

    ReplyDelete